i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
