i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't watch enough power rangers
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
40s are totally the cure
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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