Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
