so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
