I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
