Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize