Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
