If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
