I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize