Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
