There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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