Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
