I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
