I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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