That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Randomize
