you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
i think i just lost a toe
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
