I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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