Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Please don't give away my fajitas
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize