why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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