Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
