i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
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