Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize