what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
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