Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
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