im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize
