I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize