I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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