Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize