Texts From Last Night

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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?

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  (617): There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man? http://tfl.nu/v739
  Replies (36) Good night (596) Bad night (1533)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.

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  (952): I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband. http://tfl.nu/celm
  Replies (17) Good night (1905) Bad night (3714)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.

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  (608): he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily. http://tfl.nu/l76l
  Replies (40) Good night (4112) Bad night (4761)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.

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  (612): I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine. http://tfl.nu/l3m4
  Replies (8) Good night (3458) Bad night (838)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.

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  (940): He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter. http://tfl.nu/rjmj
  Replies (10) Good night (4353) Bad night (1102)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect

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  (814): Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect http://tfl.nu/4whi
  Replies (4) Good night (5345) Bad night (846)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?

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  (816): this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..? http://tfl.nu/c9f0
  Replies (9) Good night (1618) Bad night (687)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.

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  (719): hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year. http://tfl.nu/9tpx
  Replies (3) Good night (1347) Bad night (535)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny

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  (513): I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny http://tfl.nu/yacg
  Replies (8) Good night (1151) Bad night (527)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"

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  (541): I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail" http://tfl.nu/tdde
  Replies (11) Good night (2785) Bad night (512)
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  (714): View more from California

  She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?

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  (714): She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what? http://tfl.nu/cv8q
  Replies (52) Good night (1128) Bad night (5060)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.

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  (202): Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice. http://tfl.nu/it26
  Replies (9) Good night (413) Bad night (2452)
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  (916): View more from California

  Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner

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  (916): Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner http://tfl.nu/9gah
  Replies (1) Good night (456) Bad night (273)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.

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  (405): Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center. http://tfl.nu/aec1
  Replies (2) Good night (534) Bad night (207)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used

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  (519): We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used http://tfl.nu/tre0
  Replies (0) Good night (442) Bad night (176)

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