You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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