we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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