i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
