he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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