Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
