...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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