the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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