the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I need a hoe opinion
go on
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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