You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Randomize