I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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