Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
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