I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I could fuck to npr.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
