all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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