i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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