shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
