I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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