Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize