I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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