You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
false alarm, still single
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
