Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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