You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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