I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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