the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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